The Invisible Stress

Its been such a very very very long time, feels good to be back :)

Its 3 and a half month since new year's eve, its 2011 and I'm 15. Fifteen is tough, homeworks and projects is like japan's tsunami and my heart is like the earthquake, its breaking :(

To me, the worst thing is not homework, it is the invisible stress coming from someone, someone...else

Sometimes I will hate people suddenly, and I don't know the reason, why. I felt that I've did something wrong, and someone is blaming me, questioning me in silence, I can feel it. It is strong, like someone is hating me and this invisible stress is killing me !

This feeling doesn't feel good at all...I know that something bad is going to happen, I wish I coulad just die, to escape from the invisible stress...

You are always in my heart

Uncle Alex is my father's brother, he is very close to my father...

Uncle Alex is a very joyful person, he likes to tell jokes to everyone, making people happy making people laugh...until now, I still can't believe that he had leave us to another world, leaving behind his wife and his two child which is my cousin sister and brother...

Every Sunday, we will go to his house for the youth activities, everytime when he saw me, he will smile and say: " Hi, where's yr papa?" He loves my father really much, he loves his family very much, the only thing is he doesn't love himself...nobody knows that he is actually a unhappy person when he is alone, he didn't told anyone about his problems, he doesn't want people to be worried about him...

I always thought that he was a man with no problem in life, just happiness~ He is a very kind man, he treat us as her own children, he is the best uncle in the world...

Suddenly, I miss his voice ; I miss his jokes...I can't believe that he will leave us so fast!!!

My uncle passed away on the 30th of Sep, after he came back from work...he is selfish, he should not had left behind his wife and children, especially his daughter who is still studying in Ausrialia...

My cousin sister rush back from Ausrialia on the 1st of October, she did not have a chance to see her father the last time, alive...

Uncle Alex's funeral is on the 2nd of Oct, on that day I saw my cousin sister and brother, standing beside their father's coffin, coudn't stop crying...and when I saw them crying, I saw cant stop crying...D: That day is the 1st time I saw my father cry...

Uncle Alex, rest in peace, you are always in my heart...

Rubbish

I didn't did well in my English presentation today, I know its very very LAME, but I just cant think of anything better than that =(

Haizzz, I know I'm just a rubbish, a stupid rubbish, a rubbish that nobody cares about!!!

What's wrong???

Since that unhappy thing happened, I had never be happy before...I don't know what is wrong...

I can't control myself from crying these days, I absolutely don't know the reason why I'm crying...every night before I go to sleep, I must cry at least 1 time to make me fall asleep...

Oh my Goodness, I felt like I'm crazy, totally crazy...I'm exhausted and stressed, I "EXPLODING"...

WHO CAN TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG???

Boring Saturday

Wow, today is the most boring day in the week~

Hari ganti persekolahan, I like it sometimes because there will be less students, heheeee ><

Today is hari ganti for Deepavali if I'm not wrong...It was boring because Watermelon and Rainbow never come, just me, Yuki, Vanilla and JH...

During sivik period teacher never teach, so we play Hamburger...there was 7 of us : Me, Vanilla, JH, Jin yie, Yew Shiung, Eng Yaw and Guo hui...It was fun~

Science period we did the neutralization experiment, it was so cool...next week we are going to teach those who didn't come today, yay~

That's all, can't think of anything to write already, goodbye~

My First Times

First times~ Hmmmm...It really makes you happy~ I love that feeling~

The 1st one : My first time to perform in choir with my best friends rainbow and yuki, maybe I should say the first performance in this school,wow it was so so so cool~ I'm so so so happy~The performance is so great~When the audients are clapping, I felt so so so proud~Oh my goodness.......I LOVE IT!!!!!!! CHOIR ROCKZ!!!!!!

The 2nd one : My first time to wear thee blue baju kurung (costume), although it is very hot when we wear it, not that 'hot' ya...is panas, SWEAT... so so so great~

The 3rd one : My first time to wear black shoes to performance~ it was so so so...er...so...GOOD!!!! =D

The 4th one : My first time to go Winter Watermelon's house, wooohoooo~ I bet it will be very very very fun~yay~

Haha...this is all my first times~hope u enjoy them!!!

Yaayy!!!!! Boooooo!!!!!

YAAAAYYYY~ July test is finally over!!! Woohooooo~

BOOOOOO~ I can't do the kh and science paper, so difficult!!! Noooooooooo~

Haizzzzzzzz~ I'm so sad~ Very very sad~~